I'm done playing the game called life. Today I decided I was going to release everything as God has put on my heart to do. I worked so hard to get where I am today and to aquire all the stuff I have, but because of serious of unfortunate events... I'm forced to let it all go.
There is a part of me that is sad. There's another part that feels liberted.
I am surrendering my life to God. I know he has a perfect plan and I am going to let him lead me.
I am tired of trying to do it on my own. It's almost as if I have been on a quest to prove myself. But I am already approved. He loves me. Just as I am.
The scriptures say he is my redeemer, my provider, my healer, my everything. Literally, He is the air I breathe.
I realize I have not been serving the Lord, I have been serving Mammon, the God of this world. The one that has promised us riches and glory. The truth is God is the one who has blessed us with all our gifts and talents, it is He who knit us in our mother's womb, He who knows the end from the begining. Yet, I bought into the LIE. The lie that I was not good enough.
I worked my fingers to the bone, exhausting my time and my life to aquire status and stuff. FOR WHAT?! In a matter of days it will all be gone.
Why? Because I could not sustain it.
I had a talk with God and he told me that he provided all that I have, and it's time for me to surrender it all to Him. So he can give me the life I deserve.
I sometimes struggle with feelings of unworthiness and undeserving. Again, because I bought into the LIE. The lie that I am sinful and need to prove myself to the Lord. That is not true.
He did it all for us on the cross. We are his beloved children, the one's he hand picked, the one's he protects and guides and provides for. I am choosing now to TRUST and REST.
Thank you Jesus for this lesson. Thank you for the time in prayer and revelation you've provided me. I have been toiling for you as if it was not done. But you did it ALL for us. You sacrificed your life so that we may life and have it to the fullest.
The human part of me feels uncertain and my mind replys with, "what are you going to do?!" yet my spirit feels calm and peaceful, "I'm going to trust in God."